(Originally posted in the Stratford Star newspaper on May 19, 2011, in “Walsh’s Wonderings”)
It was a cold January morning when I drove past the Barnum Avenue billboard in Bridgeport, but its message warmed my very soul: “He is coming again! May 21, 2011.” I pulled my car to the side of the road and wept tears of joy. The message couldn’t have been any clearer: Justin Bieber must be scheduled to perform in the Arena at Harbor Yard!
My wife was the first to break the news. “It’s not Justin. They’re talking about Jesus.”
My sense of disappointment was deeper than missing out on a Bieber Experience: while meeting Jesus was something I’ve always had on my Bucket List, I was hoping it would be the last item left in the bucket. Luckily, the 21st is a Saturday—this won’t be the traffic nightmare it could have been.
Because I am a geek in addition to being somewhat dim, I looked into the organization that so crushed my heart. Turns out the man behind the sign is Harold Camping, the crusty biblical scholar that runs Family Stations, Inc., a Christian broadcast ministry based in Oakland, California. He’s the barnacle on channel 66 WFME, an impossibly frail figure whose seated biblical lectures are broadcast around the clock. This isn’t his first Armageddon rodeo. In 1992, Camping published a book titled 1994? in which he established Sept. 6, 1994, as the return date for Christ.
Oops.
He later admitted that his math might have been incorrect. This time, his logic is clearer: he has devined that the number 5 equals “atonement.” Ten is “completeness.” Seventeen means “heaven.” In an interview with Justin Berton of the San Francisco Chronicle in 2010, Camping explained how he reached his conclusion that the world will end on May 21, 2011. He determined that Christ was put on the cross on April 1, 33 A.D. It’s been 1,978 years since that day. Camping then multiplied 1,978 by 365.2422 days—the number of days in each solar year, not to be confused with a calendar year. Next, Camping noted that April 1 to May 21 encompasses 51 days. Add 51 to the sum of previous multiplication total, and it equals 722,500. Camping realized that (5 x 10 x 17) x (5 x 10 x 17) = 722,500. Or put into words: (Atonement x Completeness x Heaven), squared
“I tell ya, I just about fell off my chair when I realized that,” Camping said.
Me, too! It’s so simple I’m surprised we missed it. In his appropriately named follow-up book We Are Almost There! he presents additional Biblical evidence which points to May 21, 2011, as the date for the Rapture and October 21, 2011, as the date for the end of the world. Followers of Camping claim that around 200 million people (approximately 3% of the world’s population) will be “raptured,” or bodily pulled into the air to meet Christ upon His return. The rest of us will mope around until we realize we can finally get Giants season tickets. Alas, we’ll only get halfway through the season before Earth closes shop forever in October. Also, October 21 is a Friday, though, so expect delays on I-95.
In the meantime, we’ll have plenty of time to read the billboards as rush hour traffic slows us to a crawl. Don’t worry—traffic should clear up next week.
